Pieces of me

This whole blog thing is quite new to me. I just started it last week. I got to the "About Me" part of the page and hit a road block. How do I describe myself? Who am I? I started thinking about it, but it was hard to do. I started compiling thoughts in my head over a few days. Little bits of me. While it may not be that interesting to anyone else to read - it was actually a pretty interesting little project, even just for myself.

Here's what I came up with.....

I watch Young and the Restless every day - even though it's ridiculous.
I will never make a sandwich or a bed as well as my mother.
I wouldn't order Caesars if they didn't come with pickles.
I love my MAC. I've gone Mac and I'll never go back.
I have a good imagination.
I miss my grandma's cooking.
I carry floss everywhere I go.
I cherish pictures.
I hate beer, but I wish I didn't.
I love all kinds of music, but I'm a country girl at heart.
I don't like fish or seafood. But I love tuna. Explain that.
I have an addiction to chapstick/lip gloss. Burt's Bees & MAC Lip Glass especially.
I don't like when my food touches on my plate.
I miss my cat Steve. He was my buddy.
When I go home to my parents I still expect to see my dog on the steps. It's been 5 years since she died.
Sometimes I think I trust too easily.
I loved going to summer camp when I was a kid.
I love board games.
Bonfires in the summer make me happy.
I love cheese and jam sandwiches.
I try to remember to think before I speak. It's a work in progress.
I love reading. I forever want to learn.
I wish I could wear pajamas all the time.
I am easily amused. I like that.
I am annoyed by poor grammar.
My mind often wanders.
I love going to the movies. Especially with my sister.
I miss my good hockey days; with my hockey girls (they know who they are)
I could spend hours in Shoppers Drug Mart.
I am thankful my parents and siblings are all in the same city.
I am learning to stop worrying about things I can't control. I've come a long way.
I used to have issues with anxiety and I'm thankful everyday I beat that hurdle.
I lose everything and forget things every where I go. I am never surprised when it happens.
I like plucking my eyebrows.
I long to be more organized.
I have a mysterious allergy in my mouth that doctors can't explain.
I develop deep relationships with television shows.
Steven Tyler freaks me out. A lot.
I have intense, frequent dreams. That's both good AND bad.
I want to be better at golf. I haven't given up.
I'm embarrassed I don't know where a lot of countries are on a map.
I secretly still think if I had went away for University my life would have been like Felicity's.
I love road trips.
I can't drive standard. I want to.
I love ebay.
I love waking up on Sunday mornings and reading Post Secret.
I have good friends in my life. They make me laugh and I love that.
I very rarely get my mail and I know that's weird.
From past 90210 days to present 90210 days, I've always wanted Jennie Garth's hair.
I love all things Bath and Body Works.
I started getting gray hair when I was 21.
I love how all my nieces can make me laugh.
My most productive thinking happens in the shower.

A Magical Land called Victoria Secret

Would it be socially acceptable for a random stranger to walk up to you and comment on your boobs?  No, of course not.  And no one would.  BUT - you walk through the doorway of Victoria Secret and boom - your boobs are fair game.  

There is a magical essence in that store and I love it.  

As you roam through the store, fascinated by the walls and rows of bins, colours, textures and styles, you must become slightly mesmerized.  It suddenly becomes acceptable for one of the Victoria Secret girls to talk to you about your boobs.  And it's not even weird.  

They can look at & comment on your boobs.  How is that not weird?  But it isn't.  

My first experience in that store was in Grandville, a few years ago.  The girl in the store (shall I refer to her as a V.S Fairy?) told me my bra was just 'not working for me'.  Oh? I say humbly. But she was right and she proved it.  She buzzed around the store quickly and came back with a bra (that may or may not have had a halo hovering over it).  She had me stare at myself 'before', and then again 'after' she worked her magic.  Ten minutes later I don't even bat an eye spending $69.00US on ONE bra.  Something I would NEVER do in the real world.  *Side note: This was back when the American dollar was not what it is today*

And really - who is this girl?  Why do I trust her so much.  Does she have that much training? She could be anyone.  She could be the girl from the movies last night who kicked my chair all night and annoyed me.  But give her a black outfit and a measuring tape and I believe every word she says.  

You know what I am?  A corporate dream.  A statistic.  You advertise; I buy. 

I went back to the magical place two weeks ago.  My friend was looking for a new bra and I was along for the ride.  I watched one of the fairies walk up to her and measure her - disagreeing with the size bra she chose.  Calling her out on her mistake - right in the middle of the store! Again, not weird when its happening.   Minutes later, I watch her walk right into her change room, lift up her shirt and pull on the clasp at the back.  It was then I realized the power these fairies have.  I could never imagine a complete stranger doing that to me.  Anywhere else and you would have them arrested.  

I was wearing uncomfortable shoes that day and my feet were really sore.  I jumped at the chance to sit on a chair in the store that was conveniently located between two change rooms.  I sat and listened to some funny conversations and watched some fairies work their magic.  I was pleasantly amused.  

I listened to one comment to a woman on her 'top heavy frame', to which she defensively announced that she had seven kids.  The fairy would sneak into her change room and comment on all the different bras she tried on.  As though the woman said; "Hey- I am going to take off my clothes, then you come in here and judge me"  I didn't see the 'before' and 'after' show - but I could tell this mother was quite pleased with her results.  Frankly, I think the fairy should have sprinkled her with a wand and given her a bra for free.  Simply for pumping out seven kids - but that's just my opinion. 

Anyway, we left the store, my friend with her new bra in hand,  walked back through the magical doorway and into to the real world; where the only stranger who talks to me about my boobs is wearing a white coat and a stethoscope.  

Gold Locks searching for their Goldilocks

Here’s what happens when you have two friends with two different reaction modes. One may tend to be a little over-reactive while the other may be a little under-reactive (hi, that's me).

Here's how it went down:

We are on a road trip. We are in Amy’s new car and she is driving. Suddenly a light appears on the dash. We don’t know what it means. My reaction? Oh well. A light is on now. I don’t even give it a second thought. I know I would get myself out of a lot of pickles in life if I learned to think ahead, rather than my usual “we’ll cross that bridge when we get to it” attitude. But that’s just me and I’ve accepted that.

Anyway, Amy starts to panic, knowing this light has appeared to indicate something is wrong. She is right. I look in the car manual and the book instructs us to “pull over when it is safe to do so” because there is a problem with a tire. We happen to be driving by a small town and pull in. We both are well aware that we are clueless when it comes to cars. I try to calm Amy down by assuring her we’ll change this tire if we need to. She rightfully mocked me by saying “Yah, WERE going to change a tire” and I laugh.

We decide we need to check the tire pressure. We roll through the town and Amy thinks out loud that she wonders “Where the Tire Pressure Store Is”. Tire Pressure Store - HA. We pull into the gas station and agree we need to find out if they have air. As we head into the store we hesitate as we don’t know what to say when we get in. We can’t just say “Hi - do you have air?”. Or, as Amy stated “So, do you sell pressure?” Granted, we may not have been thinking straight at this point. We are both smart people, I swear. I was over-tired and feeling giddy and she was in panic mode. Keep that in mind.

I don’t know how we phrased it but the gas attendant directed us to the air machine in the parking lot. We both pretended to see it - but later admitted we didn't see it. We were looking at the pay phone. He let us borrow the little gadget that checks the tire pressure. Amy knew how to check tire pressure (She’s from Goulais) Then she discovered a big nail in the tire that we ran over. We can hear the air coming out of the tire, so we knew it was bad. We decide we have to really fill the tire with air while we resolve this problem to prevent it from going completely flat. We keep pumping the air in - then checking the pressure. Which wasn’t changing. “Boy - this sure takes a long time” we both agree and take turns putting the air in.

It’s only then the gas guy comes over and tells us we haven’t actually turned the air machine on. Wow. That’s embarrassing. As it turns out - it doesn't take long to fill a tire.










We decided to go to the 24 hour Walmart and buy a tire repair kit. We were told by Amy’s dad that our best route would be to plug the hole. There is even a tire hole plugging kit. Who knew? I decide we should buy a flashlight too (That’s what us city kids think of). We proceed to the check out line to pay for our items. That's when the tears started. I won't say who it was, but well...it wasn't me.

Next problem - who is going to do this repair? We both crack up at my suggestion to simply open our hood. I’m confident someone will come and help us then. “Hi, We need help. Yes, our hood is up - but that was just a trick. Please fix our tire.” I volunteer to wander around to recruit people. I was standing in a different gas station when I looked out the window and see someone crying again. I won't say who it was, but again - not me.

Long story short - a very nice man did come and help us. Even with his children waiting patiently in the car. The man refused to take money from us. All he asked is that we pay it forward. I have no doubt we will.

It’s funny how life sometimes magnifies who we are as people. Amy and I are a good pair. While I am often too laid back, she may be a little tense (compared to me anyway). She is too far right and I am too far left. We meet in the middle. Not too hot, not too cold....we are all on the quest for what is ‘just right’. Just like Goldilocks.

P.S. Thinking about this today, I remember that this isn’t the first time Amy and I had a car adventure together. Eleven years ago she was with me when I drove into a Mike’s Mart. Yes, I said INTO a Mike’s Mart. But that’s another story for another day. Stay tuned.