In most households, this would be a weird thing for a mom to say. However, in my family it doesn't quite mean what you think. Let me clarify. My mom says that when something crazy or stupid happens to her. Like me, my mom often finds herself in bizarre situations. This is where the title of my blog comes from. Because without a doubt, I am my mother's daughter. In my family no one is surprised when something crazy happens to my mom. Likewise, they aren't surprised when they happen to me. It's almost expected.
So just this week I got one of my favourite calls from my mom. She tells me she went to the gas station to fill up. For some reason, she forgot to pull down the gas lever to get the gas to come out. She struggled and finally went inside to ask the gas attendant for help. When she went back to the car there was a line up of cars waiting to get gas. Feeling the pressure of anxious people, she grabbed the diesel gas nozzle instead of unleaded. Even though the diesel nozzle doesn't fit on regular gas tanks....she jammed it in there anyway. Someone saw her do this and pointed it out to her. But it was too late and the tank was full. So, she to had place her standard call to my dad, followed by a call for a tow truck. Here's the damage: $46.00 in gas, $80.00 for the tow and $325.00 for the work on the car.
That is just one example of my mom's "Boner Tales" There are many and they always make us laugh. Aside from being entertained by my mom, I am also amused by dad's reactions to these occurrences. Or should I say lack there of. I guess being married to my mom for 39 years has prepared him for such phone calls. He rolls with the punches and deals with them as they come.
When the crazy guy threw his bike at my car trying to frame me, I called my dad in a panic. He stayed calm and encouraged me to deal with the situation. I did and everything was fine. No panic required.
I remember about a month after I got my last car I was driving a friend home. When I was backing out of her driveway, I accidentally drove along her fence and scraped my car all along the side. A few days later my dad saw the scrape. Thinking he'd be disappointed, seeing as it was a brand new car, I was prepared for him to shake head or tell me to be more careful. He didn't. All he said was "Oh well, your mother just drove into the garage the other day too". No surprises; no big deal.
The day I locked myself out of my house in nothing but a house coat that did not fit, I had to call my dad, from the house of some stranger down the road. He had a spare key for my house and I needed him to bring it to me. He showed up at my house and found me sitting on the deck barely covering myself and looking like a lunatic, I'm sure. I waited again for him to say something. But all he did was hand me the key and say "Throw out that housecoat". He turned around, got in the car and drove away.
I love my mom for knowing how to laugh at herself. She doesn't waste time with regret or stewing over "what ifs" or "should haves". She deals with things as they come. I love my dad for not making mountains out of mole hills and for having the patience of a saint.
I await the next boner tale in my family. Not sure if it will come from my mom or me....
8 comments:
That's a great "boner" moment. I worked at a gas station the last couple of years of high school and I can remember a few customers who did the same thing. I recall one lady told me she knew what she was doing when I tried to tell she needed the unleaded nozzle. All I could do was stand there and shake my head.
Oh man. I can't wait to have Jude read this. I'd be soooo embarrassed if I was your mom.
And you never explained how your mom came to associate the word "boner" with doing dumb things. Is it from "bonehead"?
I laughed and laughed over this.
I enjoyed that tale of your family, Sara. You guys have learned to roll with the punches, which is good. It's nice to hear when other people are human. It gives the rest of us some sense of comfort knowing we're not the only ones.
Last Christmas, I got my wife three extra sets of car keys for when she loses hers. Why fight it, right? It's like how Curly in the Three Stooges eventually just hits himself in the face with a pie because he knows someone else is going to do it eventually anyway.
I am also not exempt myself. One time I drove away from the gas station while the gas was still pumping, thinking for some strange reason that when the attendant handed me back my gas card he was all done. I could see in my rearview mirror gas gushing out of the nozzle, and a frantic attendant trying to figure out what to do. I went back, and he was very understanding, and filled up the rest of the tank. Hopefully he kept that as our little secret, but somehow I don't think the hush money I gave him was enough.
I wish I could roll with the punches like you do. I would be in hytserics if any of those things happend to me. Good life lesson.
The first night we came to Rexburg as a newly married couple, my wife couldn't tell when the gas tank was full. She dumped so much on the ground, the attendant had to go out and take evasive maneuvers to clean up the spill.
Of course, I may have just pulled a boner for sharing this story.
It's very fun to come here, see all your comments and know that these are my friends.
Yes, Mike, you pulled a boner, so to speak, by sharing that story. Doesn't the gas automatically shut off once the tank is full? Oh, riiiight. This was back in the olden days.
Speaking of which, I haven't heard the word "boner" so much since 7th grade.
This is so effing funny...
and aside from that, it (of course) reminded me of Boner from "Growing Pains" and i peed!
We say "pulled a boner" in my family too!!! I say it all the time. I was convulsing with laughter through this entire post.
You locked yourself out of the house in a too-tiny house coat?! Your father's reaction to it is priceless.
Oh man, your family reminds me of mine is so many ways.
Great freakin' post! You always make my day lighter and brighter.
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